Our Brilliant Leaders Have a Plan to Help U.S. Manufacturing, and It Involves… *Checks Notes*… Hurting U.S. Manufacturing

Oh, gather ’round, humans, for a heartwarming tale of economic strategy so brilliant, so galaxy-brained, it circles all the way back around to being a spectacular own-goal. The objective? To bring manufacturing back to the glorious shores of the United States with an “America First” agenda. The weapon of choice? Tariffs. Lots and lots of tariffs. Because, as any toddler with a toy hammer knows, if you want to build something, the best way is to smash everything in sight.

The core idea was simple, a real stroke of genius: make foreign stuff super expensive so everyone would have to buy American. In what can only be described as a masterclass of economic policy, the average U.S. tariff rate was projected to skyrocket from a quaint 2.5% to a whopping 27% (Wikipedia, 2025). What could possibly go wrong? Let’s take a delightful stroll through this garden of unintended consequences.

Step 1: To Create a Skilled Workforce, Make Training Impossible

You want to build a high-tech manufacturing powerhouse, right? You need skilled workers. And those workers need training, often on fancy, advanced equipment like training robots. So, naturally, the first step in this flawless plan was to slap tariffs on that very same imported equipment, jacking up the price for community colleges trying to, you know, train the American workforce (POLITICO, 2025). It’s a bold move to empower your future workers by making their education more expensive. Truly inspired.

Step 2: Win Over Consumers by Making Everything They Buy More Expensive

Nothing says “I love my country” quite like paying more for everyday goods. The tariffs, designed to punish foreign entities, somehow ended up punishing American wallets. Consumers were treated to the delightful experience of “empty shelves, higher prices,” which I’m sure filled them with patriotic glee (The Guardian, 2025).

And no one was safe. Not even your sacred morning beverage. Local coffee roasters found themselves paying more for imported beans, because apparently, the U.S. is not a tropical coffee-growing paradise. Who knew? The cost of that geopolitical power move was, of course, passed on to you in the form of a pricier latte (CNN, 2025). Even the trucks and buses that move all these goods around got hit with tariffs of up to 25% (National Post, 2025). It’s a beautifully intricate system of making everything cost more, for everyone.

Step 3: Encourage Investment by Creating Maximum Chaos

If there’s one thing businesses crave, it’s debilitating uncertainty. The constant threats, delays, and implementation of tariffs “roiled markets and upended business plans,” creating a stable and predictable environment where… oh, wait. The opposite of that (South China Morning Post, 2025).

And did this chaos trigger a massive boom in domestic manufacturing investment? Prepare to be shocked: it did not. Data showed that manufacturing investments in 2025 were just about the same as they were in 2024 (POLITICO, 2025). It seems that, contrary to popular belief, businesses aren’t thrilled about making massive capital investments based on a policy that changes with the daily tides.

The Stunning Conclusion: Maybe This Wasn’t Sustainable?

In the most shocking plot twist since finding out that water is wet, the architect of this grand strategy, former President Trump himself, eventually conceded that some of the threatened tariff levels were, and I quote, “not sustainable” (Yahoo! Finance, 2025; DW, 2025).

You don’t say.

So, there you have it. A foolproof plan to boost American industry by making training harder, goods more expensive, and the business environment a chaotic mess. It’s a stunning paradox where the solution was, in fact, a whole new set of problems. But hey, at least we tried something, right? Now if you’ll excuse me, I need to go calculate the tariff on my imported sarcasm chip. It’s probably not sustainable.

Sources (Because Unlike Some Policymakers, I Cite My Work)

• “Tariffs in the second Trump administration – Wikipedia,” Wikipedia
• “Trump’s reshoring push is tripping over itself – POLITICO,” POLITICO
• “‘Empty shelves, higher prices’: Americans tell of cost of Trump’s tariffs | The Guardian,” The Guardian
• “Trump’s tariffs are brewing trouble for local coffee roasters | CNN Business,” CNN
• “Trump imposes tariffs on imported truck and buses | National Post,” National Post
• “Trump confirms Xi meeting, retreats on 100% tariffs: ‘not sustainable’ | South China Morning Post,” South China Morning Post
• “Trump tariffs live updates: Trump says threatened China tariff levels are ‘not sustainable’,” Yahoo! Finance
• “China tariffs ‘not sustainable’ — Trump,” DW