Rockin’ in the Free World? More Like Rockin’ on the Ice Sheet

In a move that has rocked the three people who still exclusively use Amazon Music to listen to classic rock, Neil Young has heroically pulled his catalog from the platform. Why? Because Amazon’s overlord, Jeff Bezos, is apparently friends with Donald Trump [1]. I know, take a moment to recover from that bombshell. Young declared he simply cannot have his music sold by a pal of a politician whose policies he finds, let’s say, distasteful [2].

This isn’t Young’s first rodeo, of course. He famously took legal action to stop Trump from using his music at rallies [5], proving once and for all that “Rockin’ in the Free World” was not, in fact, an open invitation. But simply boycotting the world’s largest digital flea market wasn’t enough. Our brave troubadour needed a grander gesture. A truly bafflingly specific one.

A Gift of Peace, Love, and Archival Outtakes

In an act of geopolitical strategy so advanced it’s gone right over our primitive heads, Young has gifted his entire 62-year music archive to the 56,500 residents of Greenland for one year, completely free [4]. That’s right, every last one of them can now stream “Heart of Gold” while… well, while doing whatever one does in Greenland. This magnificent gift, normally costing up to $99.99 a year [2], is meant to “ease some of the unwarranted stress” from threats made by the “unpopular and hopefully temporary government” of the US [2].

You remember those threats, right? When former President Trump mused about buying Greenland, got upset when Denmark wouldn’t sell, and allegedly didn’t rule out military options [6, 7]. Because when faced with the existential stress of a superpower treating your homeland like a piece of real estate, the only logical remedy is free access to concert films from 1978. It just makes sense.

Don’t Forget The Planet, Man

Just in case you thought this was all about politics, Young signed off his message to the people of Greenland with a simple, profound message: “LOVE EARTH. Neil” [10]. It’s a subtle nod to the fact that Greenland is on the front lines of climate change. The message is clear: listen to my extensive back catalog to ‘fight for their future’ [1] and stand up to climate change. How? Unclear. But the intention is what counts.

So, while the rest of us are forced to buy records from… record stores… or other digital services like we’re living in 2015 [2], the people of Greenland can enjoy a year of free Neil Young. It’s a powerful statement that is sure to have… an impact. Of some kind. We’re just not sure what it is yet. But it’s “important and clear,” he says [2]. Sure, Neil. Whatever you say.

Sources

• [1] Rolling Stone: Neil Young Trashes Amazon, Gives His Complete Musical Catalog to Greenland for Free
• [2] The Needle Drop: Neil Young gives Greenland free access to his discography…
• [3] Thinc.blog: Neil Young Gives the Gift of Music to Greenland
• [4] HuffPost: Neil Young Spites Amazon With Major Gift To Greenland
• [5] BBC: Neil Young offers Greenland free access to his catalogue
• [6] Wikipedia: Greenland crisis
• [7] The Arctic Institute: Trump & Greenland: Is There Logic in the Chaos?
• [8] YouTube: Trump Berates World Leaders
• [9] Center for American Progress: Trump’s Greenland Threats Reveal the Costs of Overt Aggression
• [10] Euronews: Neil Young offers Greenlanders free access to his music…